Ok, moment of honesty here – prophetic worship music is hard for me to get into.  Singing and praying something over not only me but other people knowing that it’s not true in that moment is hard for me to buy into.  There’s a song called “The Healing is Here” and it’s a prophetic song.  The bridge says –

Sickness can’t stay any longer
Your perfect love is casting out fear.
You are the God of all power
And it is Your will that my life is healed.

Whether you buy into that last line fully, there is a powerful prophesy in it. There is a healing that comes. There’s always a healing, it just may not be how we envision it. I struggle with this. Being brutally honest – I struggle with the idea that anyone can actually be healed. I buy the lie that cancer is bigger than us. That AIDS is bigger than us. That leukemia is bigger than us. And not only that it’s bigger than us, but that it’s bigger than our God.

Shame on me.

How can I allow the curses of this world, the pains, the hurts, the brokenness of this world to reign over me? I’m like the Israelites seeing the power of Jehovah displayed in his full power then worrying about the manna. I don’t understand how all of this works. I don’t understand
why some are ‘healed’ according to man’s standard and why some aren’t. I know that the separation of life and death hurts. I know that in those moments we need more than a kind word. That sometimes the pain hurts too much. That sometimes the chasm is too wide. And in those moments we have two options – fear/anger or love. One leads to further pain. One leads to hope.

There are few men that have impacted me more than Hank Murphy. I don’t know if he ever knew that. His strength, his hope in the midst of cancer, was and is beyond anything I’ve seen. The hope he had did not come from within him. It came from outside of him, in a powerful way that only the Spirit can move. There are very few weeks that go by that I don’t think of Hank and his love for everyone up until the end. He showed grace and peace and love and every fruit of the Spirit one can show. His life was well lived. His life was impactful in spite of the pain. To quote him, he was “blessed and highly favored.”

So I have much to learn. I have to learn that just because something is not true in the moment doesn’t mean I cannot pray that it become true. Faith of a mustard seed. Faith of a child. Mountains moving. Lives changing. Hope marching on.

Til the end.